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Nottz
10-23-2008, 10:11 PM
While I lay here, 'bout to die,
I often speak to God, but why?

While diseases consume, on whats left of my life,
I cling on to my hope, as I go under the knife.

I lay here asleep, waiting to wake.
If pain is my life, what's really at stake?

The darkness continued, I began to feel good.
Was the procedure successful? Did it go as it should?

I woke up to see, not a face, but a light...
And so marks the end, of that glorious night.

(Turns out im pretty good at couplets, eh?)

Venom
10-23-2008, 10:12 PM
10/10 Beautiful.

The Zaven
10-23-2008, 10:14 PM
I love the literature. But the rhyming.. eh.

8/10

Bob Dole
10-23-2008, 10:15 PM
Makes me think of Ralph Nader, and some other things that are amazing.
You = needs to be section mod of the Literary Arts forum.

Dangt351
10-23-2008, 10:15 PM
Great Poem!

8.5/10

~Dangt351

Bob Dole
10-23-2008, 10:17 PM
Great Poem!

8.5/10

~Dangt351
Geez. . . .
Critic. . . . .

Nottz
10-23-2008, 10:18 PM
Makes me think of Ralph Nader, and some other things that are amazing.
You = needs to be section mod of the Literary Arts forum.

Wow. Thanks Bob!

10/10 Beautiful.
Thanks, I'm glad you like it.

@all other rates:
Thanks for high ratings. As for rhyming, I thought i did ok?

Thanks all!

Bob Dole
10-23-2008, 10:28 PM
Wow. Thanks Bob!


Thanks, I'm glad you like it.

@all other rates:
Thanks for high ratings. As for rhyming, I thought i did ok?

Thanks all!
Yeah. You deserved it.

Nottz
10-23-2008, 11:27 PM
Yeah. You deserved it.

Nice new social groups bob. ;)

619hit
10-23-2008, 11:29 PM
nice poems keep it up!

Nottz
10-23-2008, 11:31 PM
nice poems keep it up!

Thanks. Join my fan club if you like them so much.