Story

[Kreepy]

My vision blurred with every second. I gripped my head with both hands. I called out to the darkness that surrounded me, “WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME!” I collapsed to my knees, hands in my face. My skin was crawling. A voice called out to me.

You have been chosen.
Your fate has been sealed.
Cloud. Subject 213.
Hopefully you won’t fail like the others.


I blacked out. My eyes opened. It was a dream. I have been having the same dream for about a week now but this voice…it’s new. I crawled out of the comfort of my bed and made my way to the bathroom. I stared at the mirror, still me. I took some water into my hands in pushed it over my face. What is happening? Sighing I dried my face and made my way to my room. Suddenly, as I entered the room, my breathing increased. My eye sight narrowed. I looked down to my hands and claws started to form. I collapsed to the cold floor. I couldn’t think. I reached for my wall but my new weapons went right through the dry wall.

Two voices echoed through my head.

He is fading.

Give him time. I have faith in this one.

What makes him different?

He is actually awake this time...









This is Chapter 1. Enjoy?

[Venom]

I am liking it so far. Keep up the good work.

[Kreepy]

Thank you very much. People just like to flame me mostly.

[Xzite]

Sounds good, So far. Keep working on it.

[Every1die4]

It sounds good so far, but how come it's so short for a chapter?

Are you planning on making this a short story?

There are some unnecessary commas in your story.

[Kreepy]

I'll make sure to check over the next chapter. At the moment i'm working on the 2nd chapter. Trust me, it will be long chapter.

[sks skills]

wow. i like the beggining..its very interesting. something i might read :D.

very nice im ready to read the next 4 chapters.

[Kreepy]

There all posted if you want to read. XD

[Kreepy]

The rest sounds great. I think ya should change this sentence to something like "He turned the rusty faucet it on. Tainted water leaked slowly from it's mouth. He cupped his hands and, held his breath, and threw it against his face. Or keep it the way you have it. That's just me. Great job, dude. :)

Thanks. When I post the whole thing i'l add it. =]

[Xenthosapien]

Chapter 1 sounds good. Keep working on it. :D

[Kreepy]

Chapter 1 sounds good. Keep working on it. :D


I have all 7 chapters up as of now, Xenthosapien.