Staking

[Spanish]

I awake in the morning,
Happy as can be,

I get onto dodian,
And as usual, I start to stake,

The energy is burning,
Im crushing people to the ground,

Then comes along a mysterious person and asks?
"wanna stake?"

Of course, thinking Ill win, I say yes,
We set the options, He stakes 500m and says, Just stake 100,

Im thinking, Is this guy crazy?
Then I forget, I didn't turn off mage!

He freezes me with ice barrage,
He drains me, as I lie dead with no movement,

Another day of staking to come,
As I lie on the floor, Cleaned and Done:'(

~Spanish~

[Nottz]

Free verse poems don't usually have a rhythm that sounds like it's going to rhyme. You didn't rhyme, you used a terrible rhythm, and you wrote a poem about Dodian. Write about something you're passionate about, and if it's Dodian, I suggest you go make some friends.

[Kreepy]

I try to find something positive but as nottz said there is no rhythm at all and yeah..however i think if you edited it you could make this to an alright poem.

[Spanish]

Lol, it was my first peom. Thanks for the critisam. Ill write a new one