Violin

[Spanish]

As I lie down, sleepless for another night,
A light shines apon me,
Just enough for me to spot my violin siting in the corner,

I push the covers off and gently pick it up.
I add a touch of rosin, and I tune it very softly
I listen to all the strings as if an angel spoke,

Then I begin slowly studying all the notes to perfection,
As I begin, no one can hear, not even me, as if just gliding the bow through the air,

As I begin to play a breeze blows through the window,
A visiter came from afar to listen,
Once I finish, I look up, to see an audience of thousands in front of me.

(sorry for any spelling mistakes)

[Nottz]

Spanish, you need a bit of help with your poems. I know they don't have to, but if you're new to literature, they should rhyme. Your poems never have rhythm and to be honest, they look like a bunch of sentences slapped on a page. Work on it.

[Spanish]

I enjoy crytism, but it doesn't have to rhyme. A third grader rhymes because they know nothing.

The Tree And Me,
are the best that we can be,
the breeze flows and ice cream goes,
leaves fall and I grow tall,

You are gone,
I am sad,
Just be a good little lad.

Dude, rhyming isn't hard, Makes it sound retarted. ^^^Thats what most rhyme becomes because people think more about rhyming then about what they are saying.

[Nottz]

I enjoy crytism, but it doesn't have to rhyme. A third grader rhymes because they know nothing.

The Tree And Me,
are the best that we can be,
the breeze flows and ice cream goes,
leaves fall and I grow tall,

You are gone,
I am sad,
Just be a good little lad.

Dude, rhyming isn't hard, Makes it sound retarted. ^^^Thats what most rhyme becomes because people think more about rhyming then about what they are saying.

What I said was; If your free verse is terrible, use rhyme schemes.

[Spanish]

If they made a new user group like real instrument playing I could get in. I can only draw in real life, and im not very good at writing poems

[briese]

I enjoy crytism, but it doesn't have to rhyme. A third grader rhymes because they know nothing.

The Tree And Me,
are the best that we can be,
the breeze flows and ice cream goes,
leaves fall and I grow tall,

You are gone,
I am sad,
Just be a good little lad.

Dude, rhyming isn't hard, Makes it sound retarted. ^^^Thats what most rhyme becomes because people think more about rhyming then about what they are saying.

I like to rhyme in just about every one of my poems, though I generally think about the message I'm sending as opposed to what word I can use to fit the rhyming scheme. If you have a decent vocabulary then you can always make it work.

And if you know you're not good at writing poems then why are you having such trouble taking criticism? From one of the top literary minds the forums here have to offer, no less?

[Spanish]

I just wish someone said something nice, i like critazism, just say something positive

[Nottz]

I thought I was nice as can be. When you didn't take my criticism with good stride, I got hostile. I'm telling you how you can improve, and if you had done something good, I would've told you that it was good.