Love.

[Ed Skillz]

My first poem in English language so...

The whole table, pour off the glue
But the floor does not see only broken newspapers
Newspapers and magazines hackneyed,
Magazines with the girls' pictures,
Photo not like YOU ...

Oh, what can I do that so you would be my?
And what if the light do not burn longer??
And now the wind drives me as a leaf? lonley leaf ..
Leaf who is seeking another site ..

The whole table, pour off the whiskey
But the floor with a splash of alcohol,
Alcohol and the heart to die,
It is no longer in my hands does not rise living
So your hands to make a warm ...

Oh, what can I do that so you would be my?
And what if the wind drift me away?
I for one have to walk on the moon so sad
So you are looking for something I know that silly ...

The whole table, pour off the love
So the father's pistol, projectile, and vodka on the floor
I prostrate and love,
Love between you, me and the floor,
Floor where the drink I love pean ...

Oh, what can I do that so you would be my?
And what if my heart beat to the finish times?
I am one without you on the streets so sad
And I know without you even breathe me stupid ....

[Cold diamond]

Pretty good Ed :) ily it 8/10 plz dont say you took from another site like asian beat do with all her poems..

[Ed Skillz]

Emh why should i do that? Thats fails.



Thanks.

[Nanoblade]

You need to work on your word positioning and double check that it makes sense, but that will come with your increased knowledge of the English language. I can sympathise why It's not overly brilliant because your from Latvia.

-Luke

[Ed Skillz]

You need to work on your word positioning and double check that it makes sense, but that will come with your increased knowledge of the English language. I can sympathise why It's not overly brilliant because your from Latvia.

-Luke

Yep, you are right! ;)

[Nottz]

I actually think that your lack of grammar characterized this poem as coming from a foreigner. It gave it some flavor, so to speak. As for the poem itself, you need to be more clear about the topic, unless obscurity was your goal. Good work, especially from a secondary English speaker.

6.5/10

[Ed Skillz]

Thanks i love when people says the true! ;)